Mind over Mood (Weeks 3-4)

This article is about weeks 3-4 of our Mind Over Mood workshop. You can find out more about the weeks 1-2 HERE.

Alternatively, you can read this short description about the weeks 1-2:

Our journey began by laying a foundation for long-term wellness through the CHIME framework—focusing on Connectedness, Hope, Identity, Meaning, and Empowerment — and performing a "system check" on our internal landscape to see which areas needed more intentional support. We then introduced Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), using the Five Areas model to see how our situations, thoughts, emotions, physical feelings, and actions are all interconnected. By the second week, we shifted our focus to the "climate" of depression, mapping out how it affects our bodies and behaviours through a vicious cycle of isolation and exhaustion. To begin reversing this downward spiral, we started using the BACE model (Body Care, Achievement, Connection, and Enjoyment) and activity diaries, learning that making small, intentional changes to our daily routine can gradually shift our momentum back toward a sense of balance and recovery.

After spending the first two weeks looking at how depression impacts our bodies and behaviours, Week 3 took us deeper into the inner workings of the mind. Having already explored the physical and behavioural sides of depression, we shifted our focus to the connection between our thoughts and our feelings - and how one so often drives the other.

How do our thoughts influence our feelings?

While it's easy to believe that external situations "make" us feel a certain way, we looked at how our own thoughts are the middle step in that process. Our internal beliefs act like a lens; it is how we tell the story of an event that determines our feelings and our actions.

To see this in action, we analysed a new scenario:

You're at a party the host introduces you to Mike. As you talk to him, you notice that he doesn't look at you directly, but often looks around the room.

The participants realised that this single event could lead to a completely different emotion outcomes depending on the thought behind it:

• "He thinks I'm boring/He doesn't like me." could make you feel sad or insecure.
• "He probably feels awkward around me." could make you feel compassion towards Mike.
• "He is rude and has no manners." could make you feel annoyed or angry.

The situation remained the same, but the feeling changed based on the thought.

Understanding Negative Automatic Thoughts (NATs)

During the session, we learned that we aren't always aware of these interpretations because the happen so quickly. These are known as Negative Automatic Thoughts (NATs). They are habitual, event-specific, and can be incredibly easy to believe, even when they aren't true.

A key takeaway from the meeting was learning to untangle our thoughts from our feelings. For example, when we say "I feel like I'm being ignored", we are actually describing a thought. The true feeling underneath might be sadness or loneliness. Understanding this difference allows us to treat our thoughts as internal perspectives or opinions, rather than accepting them as absolute truths.

The Detective and the Lawyer: Challenging our Thoughts

The group moved on to a practical challenge involving a "long day at work" scenario, where we returned home to find muddy footprints on a clean carpet. This helped us see how quickly our minds can jump to unhelpful conclusions when we are tired or stressed.

To disrupt these patterns, we have to learn to take a pause and evaluate our thoughts rather than automatically believe them. Our facilitators encouraged us to try to put the NATs on trial by asking:​

• What is the evidence that this thought is true?
• Is there any evidence that contradicts or disproves this  thought?
• Are there facts I am ignoring because of my current mood?
• What other explanations could there possibly be for  this situation?
• How might someone else view this?
• Is it actually helpful for me to hold onto this thought?

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​By investigating our thoughts with this "detective" mindset, we can begin to replace automatic negative patterns with more balanced, realistic perspectives - shifting the internal weather from a storm back to a sense of calm.

To help us step into that "detective" mode, our facilitators provided us with the "Thought Record". This structured guide allows us to capture a specific situation and the Negative Automatic Thoughts (NATs) that follow, providing a clear space to lay out the evidence for and against them. By physically writing down the facts we might be ignoring due to our mood, the table helps us move away from gut reactions and toward more balanced, realistic conclusions.

Building on our exploration of how our thoughts drive our emotions, our 4th session moved from the internal world of beliefs into the physical and behavioural experience of Anxiety. If our work in Week 3 was about identifying the "middle step" of our thoughts, this stage of the workshop focuses on how we react when our internal alarm system goes off.

The Survival Instinct

We began by reframing what anxiety actually is. Rather than a "fault" in our character, it is a natural survival mechanism - our brain and body's way of trying to protect us from danger. While this "alarm system" helped our ancestors survive predators, today it often triggers in much less threatening situations, like before a job interview, an exam, or a social gathering.

Some anxiety in these moments can actually be helpful, sharpening our focus and helping us perform at our best. It only becomes a problem when it is out of proportion to the situation, feels uncontrollable, or becomes so extreme that it stops us from doing what we need to do.

​The Fear Response: Beyond Fight or Flight

When we perceive a threat, our bodies enter a state of high alert. We discussed the four primary ways our mind responds to fear:

• Fight: Becoming defensive or confrontational to overpower the threat.
• Flight: The urge to escape or avoid the situation entirely.
• Freeze: Feeling paralyzed, "spaced out" or unable to make a decision.
• Fawn: Trying to please others or "keep the peace" to avoid conflict.

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When these responses become persistent, intrusive, and impair our ability to go about daily life, "normal" anxiety can transition into Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). This is often marked by chronic worrying, physical tension, sleep disturbances, and difficulty concentrating.

​The Vicious Cycle of Avoidance

We learned that anxiety feeds on a specific cycle. When we feel anxious, our attention narrows and shifts toward ourselves, we scan the environment for danger, and our physical symptoms (like a racing heart or dry mouth) intensify. To get relief, we often use Escape or Avoidance.

While avoiding a scary situation gives us short-term relief, it creates a long-term problem: we lose confidence in our ability to cope, and the physical symptoms actually increase over time. This often leads to the use of Safety Behaviours - subtle ways we "protect" ourselves, such as:

• Always having an "exit plan" or staying near doors.
• Relying on a mobile phone to avoid eye contact.
• ​Making sure we have a specific "safe person" with us.

​Reversing the Cycle: Climbing the Steps

The key to breaking this cycle is Situational Exposure - gradually confronting the situations we usually avoid without the aid of safety behaviours. While this causes a temporary spike in anxiety, it eventually teaches our brain that we can handle the situation, and the physical symptoms begin to decrease.

1. The Distress Scale (0-100)
One should start by listing the situations we avoid and rating the distress they cause:

• 0-49 (Mild): You can still cope with the situation.
• 50-84 (Moderate to High): You are distracted by anxiety and thinking of an escape.
• 85-100 (Extreme): The anxiety is overwhelming and you just want to leave.

2. Turning Fears into Goals
Once the fear is identified (such as going into a crowded pub), we must turn it into a clear goal: " To go to a pub on a weekend night with friends and stay there for at least 2 hours."

3. The Step Plan
Rather than jumping into the deepest end, we use a "Step Plan" to climb toward our goal. When practicing these steps, we follow the "Stay" rules:

• Expect some anxiety: It is normal part of the process.
• Use deep breathing: Calm the physical response and challenge negative thoughts.
• Stay in the situation: Don't leave until the peak of anxiety begins to drop.
• Stay involved and sober: Fully experience the success of coping.

The goal of situational exposure isn't to live a life completely free of anxiety, but to live a life where anxiety no longer calls the shots. By replacing safety behaviours with genuine coping skills and taking intentional steps toward our goals, we are effectively rewriting the cycle of fear into a cycle of confidence and resilience.

We have bridged the gap between the mind and the body. After learning to challenge unhelpful thoughts in Week 3, we are now learning to challenge behaviours in Week 4. By slowing down to evaluate our interpretations and gradually facing the situations we usually avoid, we are building the resilience needed to break the cycles of both depression and anxiety.

If you would like to find out more about the Mind Over Mood programme, or any of our workshops, feel free to call us on 086 1746330 or send us an email at [email protected]. To keep updated on workshops/events, check our website and/or Facebook/Instagram/X.